I'm back!
Wow. It's been over a month since I last posted a recipe. I don't think I've ever been away from blogging for more than a week since I first started. That certainly wasn't the intention. In fact, before I had my c-section, I made sure to store up about a month and a half worth of blog posts in advance to post while I was recuperating.
A lot has happened in the past month, and even though I had those new recipes developed and photos taken, I just did not feel well enough to edit photos and work on transferring the recipes from my handy dandy notebook to a blog post.
I never expected to have such a hard time recovering after the c-section. I thought that after having the baby I would be back to my normal self and feel good again. That was not to be.
I lost so much weight after having the baby that the doctors decided to put me on TPN for a little while to give me a boost of nutrition. (TPN is total parenteral nutrition, basically nutrition given intravenously. It’s a mixture of electrolytes, proteins, lipids, vitamins, etc, that you would normally get through the gastrointestinal tract that is given intravenously.)
"When it rains, it pours", as they say. My incision was not healing properly, my GI system was acting up like crazy (I'll spare you the details there) and my electrolytes were wacky (for those of you in the medical field - I was getting 4-5 grams of magnesium IV every day). I was dealing with so much pain I could hardly function. I also ended up getting a blood infection in my PICC line which meant I had to spend a week in the hospital and get IV antibiotics for a few weeks and get another PICC line in my other arm. (A PICC line is a peripherally inserted central catheter, that is a more permanent type of IV, through which I've been getting IV fluids, TPN, IV medications and lab draws.)
Throughout this pregnancy, I've been to more doctor's visits than during the rest of my life combined.
I was getting so discouraged and just felt miserable all the time. Every time I would start to feel better, I would eventually have one setback after another. I just begged God for a little relief.
My only comfort and distraction was my precious baby boy and my sweet, caring husband. Even though we were confined to the house and couldn't really do anything fun, at least I could cuddle with Nathaniel, talk to him and just enjoy my little baby.
It was scary to realize that week after week I just wasn't getting better. I spent the last 8 months confined to the house and even though I am an introvert and a home body, after a while it started to feel like the walls were closing in.
Despair and dejection have a way of closing in when you're sitting at home alone, not having any energy to get anything done, in extreme pain and simply feeling wretched. Sergi had to take off a lot of time from work when I was hospitalized, for all the doctor's visits and on days when I felt especially bad.
So many times when I just didn't have any strength left to pray and felt hopeless and scared, I knew I had to lean on a strength that wasn't my own. I made a playlist of all my favorite songs a while ago and it was especially soothing to turn it on and listen to it.
The song "Shoulders" by the band For King and Country was a favorite of mine.
Finally, this past week and a half I started to feel better. Thank God!
I went for a walk around the neighborhood with the baby all by myself, just breathing in the fresh air and savoring the feeling of being pain free and feeling happy!
I am finally off the TPN and hopefully my labs will be normal and I won't need to have any more IV intervention. If all goes well, I'll finally say good bye to my PICC line and Lovenox. What a celebration that will be! Sergi and I recently counted that I've had more than 450 shots in the past 8 months. That's right. That wasn't a typo - a minimum of 2 every single day, not counting all the other ones, such as B12 injections, Rhogham, and lab draws when I didn't have the PICC line. I'm beginning to feel like a pincushion.
Even though I've always been really grateful for good health, I will now be even more thankful. Every day that I wake up feeling good, I will be especially intentional to thank God for good health.
Last Sunday, I finally felt well enough to go to church for the first time since giving birth. As I sat in the sanctuary listening to God's Word, I just closed my eyes and took comfort in being in the house of God and couldn't help getting emotional and crying just a bit:).
On a positive note, our baby is growing, changing and becoming more alert and playful. He is such a joy to both my husband and myself. We are so grateful that God blessed us with his miracle birth.
I look forward to finally being able to take him on walks, to the park, the beach and on errands with me. Even trips to the grocery store sound like fun.
I am slowly starting to get back to cooking again and can't wait to share more recipes with you. I still have quite a few recipes stored up to share which I developed in February and will share with you soon. However, I still recovering and get tired very quickly, so please be understanding when I don't answer your comments or e-mails quickly. Thank you so much for all your prayers and support. Please continue to pray for our family and for my health to continue to improve and for me to get strong again.
So relieved that you're starting to feel better! I hope that you have truly turned the corner and that recovery will be easy from here on out. Praying for you and your beautiful family.
Olga, I'm so glad to hear you're feeling better. I could echo what everyone else has said. 🙂 I remember my first time back at church after giving birth. They were playing the song "Blessed be Your Name." When it got to the words, "When there's pain in the offering," I cried so hard! It was such a fragile place to be in. Even though your trial has been extreme, I think we can all relate to those moments of begging and begging God to feel better or be delivered from a specific anguish. Thank you so much for your testimony!
Hi Olga,
I am so glad that you are gaining your strength and health back! Praise God! I will be keeping your family in my prayers, I have been checking your blog lately and have been worried! You are an amazing woman, just know that you have many people praying for your health daily. Your son is an adorable, happy, miracle baby; he looks just like your husband!
Dear Olga -- I was so relieved to see your post in my inbox this morning! I have been very worried about you during your absence, and knew there had to be major troubles going on in your life for you to be silent for so long. I haven't commented before but have been reading your blog for probably a year now, and also caught up on all the archived stories. During all this time I have come to feel that I know you and your family quite well, and thus was seriously concerned for your well-being and that of Nathaniel and Sergi. What a joy it is to finally know you are on the way to being well again, and to see Nathaniel smiling (beautiful!!!) and obviously happy and healthy. Thank you for making the effort to let this virtual "friend" know you are better now, and to provide us with such a detailed account of your painful journey. I write this with love and best wishes for you always -- Norma
I was so concerned when I did not get a blog post from you. Every day I tried to really pray for you and awaited anxiously for a post from you. Both my husband and I were trusting God for a miracle for you. Was so relieved to get this post. I won't stop praying for you. We lived for years in Estonia where we moved in the early 1990's and founded a Russian speaking church. We had many wonderful years there and so love the Russian people. Many came to Christ while we were there. We built our church by evangelizing in the streets and outdoor markets and so many came to know Jesus as Lord and their lives were amazingly transformed. We had a church and bible school. Even the Russian grandmothers would often walk many miles in deep snow to hear and learn about Jesus. Bless you and know that He has good plans for you and your family and never forget that He loves you and so do we! And we won't stop praying for you!
Hi Joyce! That's so interesting about Estonia because I have had contact with believers there too, in Johvi. We have ministry partners there.
Such a big part of our hearts and lives. Our years there in Tallinn was the most wonderful of our lives. How we loved the Estonians and the Russians. Estonia is the most beautiful nation on earth. We traveled to many places in Estonia to minister and tons of places in Russians and many of the former Soviet States. We love each place and the all the wonderful people we met. How glad the people in Estonia...both Russians and Estonians were to hear about Jesus. In 1990 when we started there the people used to follow us down the streets to see us for we were some of the first Westerners they had ever seen. How they loved the music we played and sang in the streets. and love the word of God we preached in our newly founded church. How we pray for Estonia now and for our people and all the people there. May God keep them safe and free.
Thank God you are feeling better. May God bless you, your husband and precious Nathaniel aboundentely. May He give you strength and full recovery. You are a beautiful soul. I realize we are so different in our walk before God, but I am sure of one thing; it's the unity I feel through Gods love no matter how diff we are. You are an encouragement in my life and blessing. I wish for God to bless you in everything! I love your recipes, very rarely post but very often cook from your website. Thanks and God bless. I love you with the love of Jesus.
Hi Olga, thank you for sharing your update. I am so happy your are getting better. I have been visiting your blog from time to time waiting for an update. Your boy is adorable. Get well dear!
Olga, I am so glad that you are finally feeling better. You are such an inspiration to many of us. Sometimes I start complaining about my pregnancy but then I always compare myself to you and my little discomforts are so minute to what you went through. You are truly a warrior!!! May God continue His healing in your life and bless your family. Your son is just a miracle and so adorable!!!! God bless you dear and our family will keep yours in our prayers : )
Olga, I'm so happy to see you are back! I bet you had everyone here worried about you.
Glad to hear you are feeling so much better and you are also looking great!! Little baby is so precious!!
All the best wishes to you and your family!
May God bless you and your special family with all that you are in need of at this time. So glad you are beginning to recover. Looking forward to new posts to your blog. Let us know of your progress as we have missed you and hope for all good things for you and family.
Dear Olga so happy you feel better! Praying for your full recovery. May God bless your beautiful family. You are such an inspiration for all us! 🙂
Милая Оличка!! Во имя Иисуса Христа будь полностью здорова и восстановлена!! Ранами Иисуса Христа мы уже исцелены!! Всякой немощи и болезни и всяким симптомам я приказываю убраться вон во имя Иисуса Христа!! Я говорю твоему телу полное исцеление , восстановление и жизнь!! Слава Иисусу Христу за Его страдания и пролитую кровь !! Будь здорова телом, духом и душой!! Благословений тебе! С уважением Инна. Ты прекрасный человек Оленька, и помни Он всегда за тебя!!
Olga, praying a lot for you. Being a nurse myself and actually taking care of patients on TPNs, etc., on daily basis, I completely understand how you feel. You and your precious family are in God's hands. May He bless you with good health. You are an inspiration to me and to many. God bless your family.
Olga, you are such a strong and beautiful person! As i read your post I cant hold back my tears, looking at your life and what you have been through makes me so thankful for everything i have and everything i go through. I pray our heavenly father will touch you with His strong healing hand and may you be restored to fullness! You are such an inspiration to so many people and i thank God for your blog! Your family is in my prayers!
Olga,
You are an amazing woman! Thank you for sharing your story. Keeping you in thoughts and prayers.
Tatyana